3/5/2019 0 Comments BodyInfertility and trying to conceive is an incredibly emotional and spiritual experience, but it’s also a very physical experience. I have heard so many stories of women who are battling their bodies, trying to force change or manipulate them into what they would will them to do or be. Struggling with fertility does not often endear one to their body, but I am so grateful that this has not been my story. Perhaps it was the years of therapy or the study of embodied spirituality that have taught me how to listen to and work with rather than against my body. Perhaps it is because fertility treatment is the only way for me to get pregnant and feels like a positive, exciting choice for me that I have not experienced it as invasive or traumatic.
I have certainly had disappointments along the way but rather than feeling like my body has turned on me, I have sensed that my body grieves, too. Throughout the journey thus far I have found ways to nurture my body through nourishing food, good rest, a regular yoga practice, acupuncture, and chiropractic treatments. During an extended break in fertility treatment I decided to welcome my period rather than resent it by sewing my own cloth pads. After several treatment cycles did not yield a pregnancy, I purchased the print pictured above to honour the hard work of my reproductive system. And most recently while being injected with a fairly strong medicine to hopefully stop and maybe even reverse the damage of endometriosis, I told my body that this medicine is not to be considered a punishment but is rather this is about taking a well-deserved rest. My relationship with this one, precious body that I’ve got is one of respect. The subtle messages that I tell myself have a lot of power over how I experience this process of trying to conceive and the whole of life. While I am still wary of the feeling of defeat – especially if I never have the opportunity to carry and birth a child - I know that I can always make conscious choices for my well-being and give myself the tender-loving-care needed to continue nurturing me.
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